31 Questions: Day 31

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 31 – What are you most grateful for, right now, in this moment?

Jayden: Safety. I feel safe and loved and happy, and that’s a feeling I haven’t felt for a while.

Richard: I just had a wonderful piece of home made bread as a snack. I’m very grateful for it. It’s really not a big deal, and I’m sure it won’t be my number one in five minutes, but sometimes it’s nice to just appreciate the little things in the moment.

AND you!

Without you, our readers, what would our blog be besides talking to ourselves? We appreciate your views, likes, and comments. We love reading and responding to your messages. We’re super excited to take on the A to Z Blog Challenge, “meet” new bloggers, and most importantly, develop our blogging community even further. Feel free to drop us a line in the comments here or via email at jrvincente@gmail.com. We’d love to have your feedback!

– Jayden and Richard

31 Questions: Day 30

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 30 – What’s your most urgent priority for the rest of the year?

Jayden: Happiness. Finding a new balance for myself. There have been a lot of major changes in my life recently, and balance is going to be an important part of the rest of my year.

Richard:  Getting into grad school. I need it for work, and I’m going for an MFA in Creative Writing, so I’m excited to improve my craft.

UPDATE: I got in! Still going to leave this up, since doing well in school is still going to be a major priority for me.

31 Questions: Day 29

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 29 – What’s the most out-of-character choice you’ve ever made?

Jayden: Leaving my marriage of over a decade. Everyone who isn’t super close to me was very shocked. A few people who are close to me were shocked. But, in the end, it was a well thought out decision that was the best thing for myself, and I needed to make myself a priority. That right there was the thing that made it out-of-character. I always put everyone else before myself–their needs, their wants before my own. And for the first time in my life, I realized that I wasn’t happy and that I deserved to be happy.

Richard:  Ever? I don’t know, that’s a lot of decisions. In the last year or so? The way Jayden’s and my relationship began was very unusual for me, and I usually wait more than three months before I move a new partner in.

31 Questions: Day 28

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 28 – Do you have a morning ritual?

Jayden: I do! I mean, ritual in the sense of I do the same thing every morning anyway. It’s mostly a taking meds, shower, brushing teeth, type of routine. I don’t know that it goes beyond that.

Richard:  Not really. I try to get up and going pretty quickly. With Covid and work from home, I usually just hop out of bed and wash up, then sign in for work. I do like to wait an hour or so from getting up before I have breakfast.

31 Questions: Day 27

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 27 – Would you rather have a live-in massage therapist, or a live-in chef?

Jayden: A live-in chef. I can’t cook well. I mean, I wouldn’t starve on my own, but I would eat the same 5-6 meals all the time.

Richard:  Massage therapist. I can cook my own food, but I can’t rub my own back. Plus, a decent massage is more expensive than a decent

31 Questions: Day 26

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 26 – Would you consider yourself an introvert, extrovert, or ambivert?

Jayden:  I am an extreme extrovert. I pretty much never want to be alone. Maybe once or twice a year.

Richard: Extrovert, but not nearly as much as Jayden. I generally prefer to be around people, and am energized by it, but I’m happy to have some me time all by myself a couple times a month.

31 Questions: Day 25

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 25 – Where & when do you get your best ideas?

Jayden: When I’m mostly asleep in bed and either trying to fall back to sleep or trying to fall asleep.

Richard: Walking outside. The more I’m moving and in nature, the better they get.

31 Questions: Day 24

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 24 – When you see peers / competitors getting things you want, how do you react?

Jayden: I’m pretty good at compersion, but sometimes I get a little jealous, which fuels me to work harder.

Richard:  I think more annoyed than jealous? I generally try to avoid competing with people, outside of games, sports, etc. It’s usually not productive for anyone.

31 Questions: Day 23

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 23 – What’s your recipe for recuperating from extreme heartbreak?

Jayden: Time, mostly. But in the interim: baked goods (cake, cookies, etc.), ice cream, mac & cheese,… so–carbs.

Richard: Usually I pick a video game, book series, etc. that I’ve been putting off since I know it’ll be a total time sink, and dive into it.

31 Questions: Day 22

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 22 – What’s your personal anthem or theme song?

Jayden: It changes at least 2-3 times a year, but currently: If Our Love Is Wrong by Calum Scott.

Richard: I’m going to go with the Space Jam theme. Especially when you mash it up with something else. This one just popped up in my Youtube recommends. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Vyrlj_WmkA Bonus points for having Megalovania in there, which is one of my favorite writing jams.

31 Questions: Day 21

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 21 – What’s something you’ve tried, that you’ll never, ever try again?

Jayden: Oh there have to be things… kinky things even.

Richard: Scalloped potatoes. What a waste of good spuds.

Jayden: Okay so, Richard called me out that this was a cop out of an answer. So… I guess I’ll add onto it. I like to try new things, especially kinky things. I’m trying to remember one that I disliked enough to never, ever do again. There are plenty of things that I don’t love but will do for the right Dom. There are a few things I won’t even try (hello, hard limits!) but it’s pretty rare that I’ll try something and dislike it *that* strongly. So, I guess I have to get away from kink…

I have a food I’ll never try again. Anything rice paper wrapped. It literally makes me gag.

Also, scalloped potatoes are delicious, and apparently I have to cook them for Richard so he can see that. (I legitimately think he’d like them if they were made well.)

31 Questions: Day 20

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 20 – What’s one mistake you keep repeating (and repeating)?

Jayden: Arguing with a friend. Trying to get them to see things the way they are instead of the way they perceive them to be. It’s like beating my head against a brick wall.

Richard: Eating too late before going to bed. I always feel like garbage.

Jayden: I guess we’ll just have to get you some more pre-sleep exercise, Richard. 😉 It would probably be in bed though.

31 Questions: Day 19

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 19 – What’s in your fridge, right this moment?

Jayden: A lot of things. But one that’s coming to mind is bread pudding! I love bread pudding.

Richard: For the record, that bread pudding isn’t there anymore. We’re filling these out ahead of time. There’s probably milk in there, we’re pretty good about keeping that. Also, eggs. I accidentally bought like 3 dozen, and we don’t go through them that quickly.

31 Questions: Day 18

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 18 – What do you value most: free time, recognition, or money?

Jayden: Free time. I’ve had a lot of times in my life where I was on the go around the clock. It’s very nice to feel productive, but I also value time to relax and do the things I want to do instead of the things I have to do.

Richard: Free time. There was a brief period where I was working 60+ hour weeks. I literally did not have time to spend the money I was making with overtime, and I was miserable. Free time is the hardest to come by, but you can use it to get recognition or money if you want it.

31 Questions: Day 17

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 17 – What are you an expert on? Is it because of training, lived experience, or both?

Jayden: Spreadsheets! Okay, maybe not. I’m really good at them. But I do think I’m an expert at my day job, which I don’t really talk about on here.

Richard: Sourdough! Hint: Use the discard for pancakes with jelly or honey.

Jayden: I can totally vouch for Richard’s Sourdough. Oh my goodness, it’s amazing. I didn’t even particularly like sourdough before I met Richard, and now I lament any time we don’t have it in the house!

31 Questions: Day 16

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 16 – If you could sit down with your 15-year old self, what would you tell him or her?

Jayden: That it’s going to work out okay. No matter what, hang in there, because it will all work out okay.

Richard: That our life is going to be really weird, but mostly in ways that he’ll think is awesome. If possible, I’d have a slideshow of strange things we did, said, etc. with minimal context.

31 Questions: Day 15

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 15 – If you could choose your own life obstacles, would you keep the ones you have?

Jayden: : I don’t know. I’m not sure that’s a choice I would want to make. As a submissive, I often dislike making choices, and choosing my own life obstacles seems like a difficult path.

Richard: No, I’m sure I could min-max some optimal obstacles that were minimally inconvenient, if not advantageous somehow.

31 Questions: Day 14

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 14 – How do you reign in self critical voices?

Jayden:  My own self-critical voices are very difficult to reign in. Having a partner to remind me of my own self-worth is very valuable. I hate to put that on them, but sometimes I forget that I can be good at things.

Richard: 90% of the time, it doesn’t matter if I suck as bad as I think I do anyway.

31 Questions: Day 13

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 13 – How do you engage with panhandlers on the street?

Jayden:   I’m very uncomfortable, in general. I’m a petite woman, so safety is something that’s been ingrained in me, and I did live in a big city for a long time. That said, I have a lot of compassion for people who are down on their luck. One of my most memorable experiences was working with a soup kitchen and helping the homeless.

Richard: I used to usually give to them, but I don’t carry cash/change as often anymore. It makes me feel bad.

31 Questions: Day 12

Marquessa Matthews challenged herself and other bloggers to answer 31 questions during the month of March. You should check out hers and comment below with a link if you’re playing along!


31 Questions
March 2021

March 12 – Have you ever unplugged from the Internet for more than a week?

Jayden:   Yes, and I’d love to do it again soon. That’s probably because the only time I’ve done that was when I was on a cruise, and going on a cruise sounds glorious.

Richard:  I haven’t. The closest I’ve ever come was when I worked at a summer camp, but even then it was Sunday afternoon to Saturday morning. At this point, I don’t think I could do it with work, we were 90% or more online even pre-Covid. And how would I get you all smut without the internet? I guess I could write everything offline, then make Jayden post it.