We’re continuing answering the questions from our list. Check last time’s if you missed them!
How socially connected is your submission? Do you look for others to talk to about your submission for support or networking? Do you go to events or connect through another sort of social grouping either in person or online?
Richard: I have a fair number of D/s friends (and a few mostly vanilla ones that I talk kink with.) I’ve used a variety of kink and kink-adjacent websites, chat rooms etc., and have made some lasting friends there. I’ve been to munches, etc. in the past, and would like to start going again.
Jayden: And hey, we did that! We went to one munch so far in our local area, and we’ll probably go to more. I am excited because I have now met another submissive who I have formed a good friendship with. It’s so, so nice to be able to talk about kinky things and not have people look at you strangely. When you say things like, “He choked me last and it was so fucking hot!” or “Look at this bruise!” We were just remarking the other day at a dinner party that it was fun to be at a dinner party where it was totally acceptable for me to whip out my chest to show off a bruise.
In general, my submission had a behind-closed-doors feel to it, but I am really glad to say that that is no longer the case. I am excited to be more social about it and connect with other kinky people.
Is there a physical position that makes you feel most submissive?
Richard: Being tied up makes me squirmy and bratty.
Jayden: Kneeling is generally a good one. Anything that puts me physically below my Dom (though I’m short, so that’s most of the time anyway). And, as Richard said, tie me up!
How socially connected is your dominance? Do you look for others to talk to about your dominance for support or networking? Do you go to events or connect through another sort of social grouping either in person or online?
Richard: It comes and goes. I like to have kinky friends to talk about these sorts of things with. I have a handful of good friends who are generally involved in kink, so I usually have at least a few to talk to. One of our friends recently got involved in a new relationship that’s significantly kinkier than most of his prior ones, so it’s nice to talk to him and his new partner about it. I don’t really like to go to kink events solo, but if I have a partner it’s fun to go out. More rarely I’ll go with a friend.
Jayden: I haven’t been dominant enough to have any kind of support or networking. I guess you could say that for a brief time, I was being dominant in text with a sub and Richard was coaching me through it. That was definitely helpful.
Is there a physical position that makes you feel most dominant?
Richard: Putting my sub in a face down-ass up position is good. And of course, you can’t beat having someone kneeling at your feet.
Jayden: (For the record, I didn’t read Richard’s dominant responses before I wrote my own submissive ones. Yeah, we’re on the same page almost all the time…) As a Domme, having someone kneel at my feet, especially someone who is usually taller than me is hot. I like it when they have that pleading look in their eye. It makes me feel powerful.