Strange, Stranger

1. If you had to lick a stranger’s sweaty armpit everyday for the rest of your life to save the life of your significant other would you do it? (Thank you Master of None).

Jayden: I suggested to Richard that we have a suicide pact in the event that this became necessary. If it came down to it, I’m sure I would do it to save Richard’s life, but like…I just can’t imagine the scenario in which this is necessary.

Richard: Are they shaved at least?

2. What is something you escaped from?

Jayden: Unhappiness. When I read the question, my immediate reaction was, “my marriage” but that makes it sound like I had to run away. My ex and I are still friends, in fact. The reality was that I had to escape from the mental image of what my life should/could be and realize that I wasn’t happy with the way it was and that only I had the power to make changes. I made a lot of very big changes in a short amount of time. It was scary. Terrifying, even. But it’s been over three months since the last major change, and I am very, very happy.

Richard: Delaware. I don’t know what was going on, but Waffle House was closed, so we were lucky to make it out alive.

3. Have you ever done an Escape Room game with strangers? Did you solve it and get out on time?

Jayden: I have! I went with friends, but we partnered up with a couple for a room that required a crowd. We did get out in time and had a lot of fun doing it! 100% will go again.

Richard: No, I haven’t even done one with friends. I’ll make Jayden take me at some point.

4. What is the strangest/craziest DM you have received?

Jayden: Years ago, my (then) girlfriend and I received the exact same message on a dating app. So we responded with the exact same message. As the conversations continued, we sat side by side and sent the exact same messages no matter what he said. We giggled and giggled, and it took him about half an hour to figure it out. I love that story!

Richard: I don’t think I’ve ever had any good ones. I don’t think my boobs are big enough. 😦

5. Do you DM strangers? Why?

Jayden: I generally choose to spend my time these days doing other things, but I have DMed strangers and I’m not against it. I like talking to people. It’s so fun to get to learn about the way other people experience the world.

Richard: How else would I un-stranger them?

6. Do you watch “Stranger Things” on Netflix?

Jayden: I haven’t, though it’s on my list of things to maybe watch when I have time again.

Richard: I did. Season 1 was good, the rest is kind of meh.

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TMI Tuesday questions are life questions.

1. Do you typically wake up feeling optimistic?

Jayden: Usually. I am The Sunshine.

Richard: I try to never be optimistic.

2. Do you pursue your passions?

Jayden: Yes, that’s why I’m a writer.

Richard: I’m going for an MFA, so I guess so.

3. If your life was affected by covid19 lockdowns/restrictions how have you pursued your passions during the pandemic?

Jayden: I wrote. Not as much as I wanted to, but I definitely used the time to find myself in a new way and get a lot of inspiration for future novels.

Richard: So. Much. Bread.

4. Is there a conversation you need to have with someone but you have avoided? Tell us the basic subject and your relationship to the person.

Jayden: Uhh. I’m a pretty open person, so probably not. There are a few people I’d like to tell off about them talking behind my back about Richard and me, but it’s not worth the drama.

Richard: I should probably tell my parents that Jayden lives with me.

5. Fill in the blank. When my partner is around I feel _ .

Jayden: Comfortable.

Richard: Snuggly.

Bonus: Are you living in reality or a fabricated fantasy?

Jayden: Fantasy. I always think things are better than they are.

Richard: All reality is fantasy.

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You have nothing else better to do but play TMI Tuesday. Let’s get right to it.

1. Your first night out after covid19 lock-down and you catch a friend making a drunken pass at your significant other. Which of the following most mirrors your feelings or thoughts?

a. Ignore it, they are drunk off their ass.
b. Alcohol is a truth serum, true feelings come out and this false friend is after my honey.
c. Well, my babe is pretty hot so I can’t blame them for making a move.
d. After a year of lock-down, people are likely to flirt with a lamp-post. It is no big deal.
e. Hmmm, I wonder if this friend is up for a threesome?

Jayden: It depends on the person, but either c or e. My sweetheart is very sexy! But also, threesomes are a ton of fun.

Richard: Probably D. Maybe E if it was someone I was into.

2. True or False. I am so bored with vanilla sex?

Jayden: I don’t remember the last time I had purely vanilla sex. I would be terribly bored by it.

Richard: True! It’s been like a year, but still bored from then.

3. Is it unreasonable to hope for mind-blowing sex when you have been together for several years?

Jayden: We haven’t been together for years, but I expect our sex to still be mind-blowing decades from now. We both have a lot of kinks and are very invested in keeping our relationship exciting and fresh.

Richard: Totally reasonable. I’ve been in relationships where the sex started out just okay, but got better a few years in once we were more comfortable with each other.

4. Name two things that could doom your current romantic relationship?

Jayden: Oh jeeze. What are we in couple’s therapy? (Not knocking couple’s therapy! Just teasing.)

Not being honest with ourselves and not being on the same page with our future.

Richard: Asteroids and Vacations.

5. A local sex educator is holding orgasm classes–as in how to give an orgasm. Would you sign up to be a student or be the demonstration model?

Jayden: The thing is, I don’t think there’s a way to teach a “how to give an orgasm” class, unless it’s just “how to listen to your partner’s body and respond.” So I guess I’d be the model.

Richard: I think my track record for giving orgasms is pretty solid, so I’ll be a model.

Bonus: May 18 is World No Dirty Dishes Day. How will you celebrate?

Jayden: Oh boy! I do a good portion of the dishes, so that sounds divine! Unfortunately, Richard is making homemade soup, fresh bread, and homemade croutons today, so I suspect there will be plenty of dishes to wash. But that’s okay because…bread, soup, AND croutons! Yum!

Richard: There are so many dishes. I’m going to go help Jayden as soon as I post this.

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1. Agree or Disagree with “Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.”

Jayden: Mondays used to get me down, and then I got a better job. I actually like rainy days, as long as I don’t have to go anywhere. It’s a nice time to relax with a book and mug of tea.

Richard: Rainy days are the best. I don’t really think Mondays get me down, but they’re not my favorite either.

2. What do you like to do on a rainy day?

Jayden: Whoops, I already answered that. 😉 Oh, and snuggles!

Richard: Snuggles! And write, and drink warm drinks. And just listen to it.

3. What do you refuse to spend money on?

Jayden: Water. Tap water or water fountain water is fine. I’ll bring my own almost everywhere I go.

Richard: Fire starters. I can get perfectly good dryer lint from the basement.

4. If money and practicality were not a problem, what would be the most interesting way for you to get around town?

Jayden: I love public transportation. People watching is so fun. In my current city, we don’t have trains and the bus system is terrible. Maybe someday.

Richard: Jetpack.

5. What is the most frustrating product you own?

Jayden: My phone. It’s both the best and worst thing I own. When it works, it’s great. When it doesn’t work, it sucks.

Richard: My Blu-Ray player. I hate all the unskippable ads at the beginning (I miss watching DVDs on the computer) and it crashes just enough to annoy me, but not enough to replace.

Bonus: If you could hack into any one computer, which computer would you choose?

Jayden: I can’t even imagine. Is there one that knows what the winning lottery numbers are going to be? That would be fun.

Richard: One on a submarine, and then I’d make it play “Yellow Submarine” on repeat for days.

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Let your imagination run wild to fill-in the blanks this TMI Tuesday.

Fill in the blank.

1. Friends = _____

2. I’m done with _____.

3. I’m ready for _____.

4. The oldest _____ I have is _____.

5. Take some _____, mix it all together and you have _____.

Bonus: Tonight I am looking forward to _____, and tomorrow I really want to _____ !

Jayden:

1. Friends = love We don’t say I love you enough to our friends. (Most people don’t. I do.)
2. I’m done with drama! No more. No thanks.
3. I’m ready for Summer!
4. The oldest friend I have is K. She’s been my best friend since 4th grade and I adore her.
5. Take some yummy ingredients, mix it all together and you have delicious food, at least you do when Richard does it. If I mix ingredients you end up with…well… nothing delicious.
6. Bonus: Tonight I am looking forward to snuggles, and tomorrow I really want to spend time with my partner!

Richard:

1. Friends = Better than family
2. I’m done with Covid! I’m tired of it, and I got my shots, so I think it should be over.
3. I’m ready for grad school!
4. The oldest pen I own is 12 years old. I gotta pump those number up.
5. Take some penny, mix it all together and you have good luck. That’s how the song goes, right?
6. Bonus: Tonight, I am looking forward to sleep, and tomorrow I really want to sleep in.

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1. Are you ready to go? Where are you going?

Jayden: I am so ready to go! I’ll go anywhere but here! Okay, that’s not totally true, but I am very ready to go on a couple of trips coming up in the next few months. Very, very excited. Two are to the beach, which is amusing because I’m not a super beachy person, and the other one is to the mountains, and I’m not a super woodsy person either. But in any case, I’m very excited.

Richard: I’m ready to go to grad school! Even though I’m not going anywhere, since it’s virtual for the first chunk.

2. There is something wrong with dating, what is it?

Jayden: There are lots of things wrong with dating. So many people misrepresent who they are in ways that are detrimental to the relationship. It’s exhausting to try to figure out who is being honest about who they are.

Richard: I dunno, I feel like I’m the only person in the universe that likes dating. You go out, if you have a good time, it’s good. If you have a bad time, you start saying absurd things to see if they notice.

3. Born to be wild–what is your wild?

Jayden: I’m wild in the bedroom. I have very few limits, so you name it, I’ve probably tried it.

Richard: My hair is pretty wild right now. My barber retired, and I can’t find a new one that I like.

4. Pick your best feature and sell it to us?

Jayden: My best feature is my smile. One of my best friends calls me the Sunshine because I light up the room. My positivity is my strongest personality feature, and my smile goes along with it.

Richard: Jayden would probably say my shoulder freckles. See mom, all those sun burns worked out!

5. Fill in the blank. This may sound a little weird but _____ .

Jayden: I’m a little tipsy right now after drinking three sips of a margarita. Also, it took me three tries to spell ‘margarita’.

Richard: Sometimes I wonder if Liam Neeson would be as much better of a president than Ronald Reagan as he was an actor.

Bonus: If you were trapped in a store all night, in which store would you want to be trapped?

Jayden: Bed, Bath, and Beyond. Plenty of comfy beds and dozens of crazy cool gadgets to try out!

Richard: One of those giant Nintendo stores, like the one in New York. I’m not going to sleep well anyway, might as well be somewhere with lots of stuff to do. And it’s a good story!

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Money Honey

1. Has money ever ruined a relationship for you?

Jayden: I don’t think so.

Richard: Nope

2. Have you ever successfully negotiated a pay raise?

Jayden: I got lucky and didn’t have to, since they offered me above my negotiation target.

Richard: No, I’ve tried a few times, but never really had that kind of job.

3. What piece of MONEY advice would you tell your younger self?

Jayden: You don’t need all that stuff.

Richard: Don’t live with someone that can’t cover their share of the rent.

4. Have you ever paid for sex or been paid for sex?

Jayden: Not in cold hard cash.

Richard: One time I paid a girl in make outs for gossip.

5. Are you hiding a financial secret?

Jayden: No.

Richard: No. I don’t have anyone to hide stuff from.

Bonus: Have you made someone smile today? If not, please take up the challenge and make someone smile.

Jayden: I just made people smile telling a story.

Richard: I fixed someone’s Zoom!

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1. What is an ideal weekend for you?

Jayden: This is an interesting question. My ideals have changed a lot in the past few months. But, a perfect weekend for me involves some times with friends, good food, and lots of laughs.

Richard: I think that depends on my mood. Some weekends, it’s fun to barely get out of bed. Others it’s fun to wake up somewhere I’ve never been. I think I should get to bake regardless though.

2. What is the craziest job you would consider taking?

Jayden: I’m not super exciting when it comes to this kind of question. I think quitting my day job to be a full-time writer would be super crazy!

Richard: Professional mascot. What could be crazier than being Gritty?

3. Where would you rate yourself as a kisser on a scale of 1 to 10? (10 being the best kisser ever!)

Jayden: Uh, this is a difficult question. I don’t think super highly of myself, typically. So I’d say like a 4. Richard can feel free to disagree.

Richard: Jayden is at least an eight out of ten. Minimal slobber, and good use of tongue. I’m going to say seven out of ten for me.

4. What do you like most and least about your significant other’s cooking?

Jayden: Well, this is awkward. 😉 Richard is my significant other! The thing I like most is also the thing I like least, haha. He makes me try new things (yay) like vegetables (blah). But seriously, I love Richard’s cooking. He makes a lot of different things I’m not used to eating and many of them are a lot healthier than what I would make myself.

Wait! I know something I dislike! He makes a lot of dishes and we don’t have a dishwasher. 😉

Richard: Least favorite, it doesn’t happen very often. Most favorite, it’s very different from mine, so it’s fun to try new recipes.

5. How has smartphone photography changed your world?

Jayden: I take pictures a lot. It’s fun to watch my daughter grow up in photos that wouldn’t have existed if it weren’t for smartphone photography.

Richard: As a person with atrocious handwriting, it’s nice to be able to take pictures of stuff like my license plate and not go, “Is that a Q or a 9?”

Bonus: What is a good life?

Jayden: Oh boy. This is another tough question. A good life is one filled with happiness, love, companionship, and friendship. One where you leave the world a little bit better than it would be without you.

Richard: One where you don’t have to worry about too much day to day stuff (food, housing, etc.) and can make the world a better place.

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Hurry hurry step right up, tell us a few of your favorite things at TMI Tuesday blog.

1. What is your favorite dessert? Why?

Jayden: Pecan pie bread pudding. Because pecan pie and bread pudding are two of my favorite things.

Richard: Teaberry ice cream with rainbow jimmies because it tastes like Pepto.

2. What is your favorite nickname to be called?

Jayden: Bead Goddess

Richard: NaNoDad

(These are the nicknames our local writing group have given us.)

3. What is your favorite nickname for your favorite person?

Jayden: Bipwiget (which is what I call Richard)

Richard: Pineapple (which is what I call Jayden)

4. Who makes you laugh the most?

Jayden: Richard

Richard: Sam, one of my writing friends

5. What is something common from your childhood that will seem strange to millennials?

Jayden & Richard: We’re in our 30s and we are millennials.

Bonus: What is your idea of heaven?

Jayden: Have you watched The Good Place? That. (If you haven’t, YOU SHOULD. Also, there’s a podcast. It’s amazing.)

Richard: Heaven is a Place on Earth Jokes aside, I always thought Heaven would be different for each person, if it was real. What I like might be torture for someone else, and everyone wanting/liking the exact same thing is just a stock dystopian novel plot.

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Would you rather:

Have sex with someone who never showers or someone who never brushes their teeth?

Jayden: This is tough. Bad breath and BO are both awful. I guess someone who never brushes their teeth. We can just…not kiss?

Richard: Never brushes their teeth because I could always put them in a gag or a hood or something.

Only have sex in the shower for the rest of your life or only have sex on the floor for the rest of your life?

Jayden: On the floor. I’m liable to slip in the shower and get hurt.

Richard: Floor, because we could have a designated area for sex that we kept clean and put a mat down on.

Cry every time you had sex or burp every time someone kissed you?

Jayden: Cry every time I had sex. Who knows, maybe it’s a good cry?

Richard: Cry every time I had sex. I don’t want to burp in my partner’s face. That’s much more awkward.

Find out the last person you had sex with was your long lost cousin or that the person you last had sex with was a brutal serial killer?

Jayden: I guess long lost cousin. We aren’t having kids anyway!

Richard: Cousin seems more stable for a long term relationship, but serial killer is hotter for a hookup.

Bonus: Would you rather always say what you are thinking or never be able to speak again?

Jayden: Oh damn. I couldn’t not speak, so I guess I’d go with always say what I’m thinking.

Richard: Always say what I was thinking. I’d probably get fired from my job, but I bet I could work the talk show circuit and write a book about it.

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I wish my Job got eaten by a whale.

1. What was your first job?

Jayden: Wing girl- Counter service at a chicken and ribs restaurant.

Richard: Camp counselor

2. In your next life what will be your job?

Jayden: Musician

Richard: Afterlife RA. I’ll have to sign in everyone’s dates when they want to bring someone from The Bad Place to The Good Place.

3. What’s a favorite item in your workspace and why?

Jayden: My computer, it lets me do spreadsheets!

Richard: My singing bowl, it lets me annoy people!

4. What can you not stop thinking about?

Jayden: My Master’s dick! How delicious this tea is.

Richard: How hard Jayden bites. Chocolate.

5. What are you holding on to that you cannot let go– a person, a show, an item, a career, a book–anything?

Jayden: Happiness

Richard: Battletech

Bonus: Do you have a Twitter problem?

Jayden: No, I don’t use it nearly as much as I should.

Richard: I think Twitter is a problem.

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Money, Money, Money

1. If you pay someone to do one chore what would it be?

Jayden: Cleaning

Richard: Dishes

2. If I gave you $1,000,000 usd, how much would you give to charity?

Jayden: I’d try to give about 25%.

Richard: I don’t know that I’d give any up front. I think I’d like to find a specific cause that I want to support and try to give them what they needed, as opposed to just throwing an arbitrary number.

3. What is the most annoying thing your (current or past) partner does with money?

Jayden: Not helping with the budget, but complaining that he wasn’t “allowed” to buy things he wanted.

Richard: I dated a girl who had tends of thousands of dollars in the bank, and a similar amount of credit card date. She refused to use her savings to pay down the debt, and just made the minimal payments, racking up interest.

4. What is something you bought as a couple but would be embarrassed for your parents to know?

Both: We haven’t bought very much together yet. Ummm, a fancy laser printer?

5. What money-related thing have you hid from your significant other?

Jayden: I once bought a fair of fuck-me-shoes and didn’t tell my partner.

Richard: For a while I was working a job where I could pretty much set my own hours. I definitely pretended to work most days, but sometimes I just kinda bummed around for most of a week.

Bonus: If you received $1,000,000 right now would you tell people? Why or why not?

Jayden: I would tell as few people as possible, but I’m too open of a person to keep it a secret. I would want to invest it to better my future and telling too many people would make that difficult.

Richard: I’d probably just tell Jayden. Other than that, I’d have to figure out what I was doing with it, etc. I’d probably pretend I got a smaller amount. Enough to celebrate, but not life changing money. I wouldn’t want it to affect my relationships.

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Oh you sexy thangs!

1. Pick your next sexual encounter. Only pick one, then tell us why that is your choice.
a. Blindfolded during oral sex
b. Sex in a hot tub
c. Sex in an elevator
d. Phone sex
e. Bringing in a third party

Jayden: Sex in a hot tub! I just need a hot tub. (Okay, so I would prefer a whirlpool bathtub. Much more sanitary.)

Richard: Sex in an elevator! That confined space, and sometimes mirrors, make it sound sexy. It’s mostly private, but in a public place. Also, it’s the only one I haven’t done. Gotta try new things.

2. When could having sex with an ex be a good thing?

Jayden: I have a good physical relationship with an ex before. He and I were not a good couple. But the sex was good. Being friends with benefits worked out well for us for a while, and now we’re actually friends.

Richard: Sure. I’ve had ex-sex with about half my exes, and I don’t think I ever regretted it.

3. Have you ever had sex in a public toilet? No judgment. (Oooh you nasty!)

Jayden: Only oral. Actually, we might have tried for more, but we only did oral. Teenagers!

Richard: When I was in college, my girlfriend and I were both RAs. Since I went to the worst university on the planet, we didn’t get our own rooms. We did, however, have access to the master keys, and there was a public bathroom that was always locked. We let ourselves in a few times when we couldn’t get rid of our roomies.

4. Car sex is hot or not?

Jayden: Ehhh. Usually it’s too crowded in the car and uncomfortable. I might be a bit *cough* of a pain slut, but that’s not a good type of pain.

Richard: I’ve tried once or twice and always gave up since it was a pain in the ass, so I guess not.

5. What is the most appealing thing about you?

Jayden: I’m a friendly person who likes to smile a lot. I like making other people feel good–sexually and not sexually.

Richard: I think it’s my energy. I’m good at getting people to get out and do things they want to do, but need a push for.

Bonus: Some time ago in Geneva, Switzerland, a coffee shop opened where you can get a hot, delicious cup of coffee, with a side of hot, delicious blowjob. That’s right, after you order your coffee you use an ipad to select the sex worker that you want to have give you the blowjob.  A – Would you visit this coffee shop? B – Would you get the blowjob?

Jayden: Well, I don’t have a dick, so… But let’s assume that they mean you get oral from a sex worker. Sure, why not? Sex work is legitimate work and should be treated as such. No shame!

Richard: A: Sure, why not? B: If I only went once, yes. If I was going regularly, I’m sure not every time. I’m curious how it’d be with a professional. I’ve never been able to climax from oral, so maybe this would be my chance.

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You’re back! Excellent.

This week’s TMI Tuesday…

It’s definitely YOU

1. For you, what would be the worst store to have a $1,000 gift card for?

Richard: The Warhammer store. The main thing keeping me from playing is knowing I’d spend way too much money on it if I did.

Jayden: Forever 21, none of those clothes would ever fit me.

2. Besides a raise or more vacation time, what is the best perk a company can offer you?

Richard: Permanent work from home.

Jayden: Free/better health plan.

3. What are you most likely very wrong about?

Richard: Getting into grad school.

Jayden: Things are totally going to calm down soon.

4. What is something you borrowed but never gave back?

Richard: My ex girlfriend’s desk.

Jayden: My ex’s tape measure.

Bonus: What have you struggled with your entire life?

Richard: Gravity.

Jayden: My weight and self esteem.

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Just Wondering…

1. What food did you eat so much of that now you hate it?

Jayden: I don’t think there’s anything I hate because I ate it too much, but there are foods I can only eat occasionally, like egg rolls.

Richard: I really don’t think that food exists for me, but I’ll think about it.

2. What two films would you like to combine into one?

SWITCH!

Richard: The Mummy and Indiana Jones

Jayden: I’m bad at these types of things. I’m going to say Indiana Jones and National Treasure, but I cheated and stole the idea from Richard.

3. What songs do you feel compelled to sing along with when you hear them, even if you do not know all the words?

Jayden: Don’t Stop Believing, I think I know all the words, but I still have to belt it.

Richard: Total Eclipse of the Heart

4. What is the weirdest place you have ever slept?

Jayden: At the dining room table, with my forehead on my friend’s shoulder.

Richard: On top of a table at a pottery kiln.

5. Who is the weirdest person you have ever slept with, and why do you say this?

Jayden: I grew up with a guy almost like siblings. We took family vacations together and everything. Later we dated. In some ways it was kind of weird, but it didn’t last forever.

Richard: In college, I hooked up with a girl whose only erogenous zone was her neck. She didn’t really enjoy intercourse, but she could orgasm from having her neck nibbled very easily.

Bonus: What do you think you do better than 90% of people?

Jayden: Spreadsheets! (But Richard says Beads.)

Richard: GIFs

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1. Who do you prefer to discuss politics with?
a. partner
b. best friend
c. co-workers
d. strangers
e. parents

Jayden: None of the above? I’ll talk politics, but I don’t prefer to do it. I do talk with my close friends and partners though.

Richard: Strangers, because then you can get into pointless internet arguments with them.

2. Which is more offensive to you: book burning or flag burning? Why?

Jayden: Book burning. I’m an author, so… Plus, book burning is generally a censorship issue.

Richard: Book burning, because I don’t believe in censorship.

3. Complete the sentence. Most of all, I want to meet someone who deserves my _____ :
a. trust.
b. loyalty.
c. admiration.
d. love.

Jayden: Trust. It doesn’t matter what type of relationship I’m forming, trust is important.

Richard: Trust, because trustworthy people can be difficult to find.

4. Which kind of fidelity (being faithful) is more important to you?
a. Physical/Sexual.
b. Mental/Emotional.
c. Neither is important.
d. Both are equally important.

Jayden: I would say d. Both are equally important. I was going to say that physical/sexual is maybe slightly more important to me as a poly person, but… then I went the other way. So, yeah. Equally important.

Richard: b. Mental/Emotional because no dick is that good.

5. Would you avoid all contact with an ex if your current significant other asked you to?
a. Yes, of course!
b. No. This would be an unacceptable demand.
c. Only if their justification seems reasonable.

Jayden: b. No one gets to dictate who I can be friends with. I can go ahead and say Richard is going to say the same thing.

Richard: b. I had that argument with an ex and I stuck to my guns then and I would stick to them now in any other relationship.

Bonus: If you were to die, the person going through your belongings would be shocked to find _____ ?

Jayden: I don’t know that they’d be shocked by anything, honestly. I’m pretty open with the people closest to me.

Richard: A stack of cat traps.

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